trying out new things...

For those who dont know, Huckleberries are a huge deal up here in Washington. I had never tried a huckleberry until about a month or so ago when a friend of mine gave me a small sandwich bag to try.  They are quite delicious.  I usually explain them as a blueberry that had sex with a raspberry and made huckleberris.  They look a lot like a blueberry with a red tint.  They have a tart sweet flavor and are covetted here, to the point that people wont tell you where they pick them so they can maintain their "spot".
Anyhow, my husband has been absolutely wonderful and has picked about 5 gallons of these wonderful berries.  We gave 1 whole gallon bag away to a couple friends.  The other bags I have been using to test out different cooking recipes/adventures.  I have made 5 Huckleberry cakes, 1 Huckleberry pie, and 1 set of Huckleberry jam.  They have all been pretty amazing. 
So, now I am making Huckleberry everything pretty much every day.  The big challenge with all of this is the fact that everything I have made is not so good for us nutritionally speaking.  Because of this, I have been giving away Huckleberry everything and my friends have been both ecstatic and surprised as most huckleberry items are expensive and usually hoarded.  Maybe Im crazy, but we just cant (and shouldnt) be indulging in all of this stuff.
C has been suggesting we make the jam and stuff and send it to people for Christmas.  A few of my friends and family on FB have asked to have me send them stuff... its all been pretty entertaining.  It also makes me want to become a better cook. So I guess this is the true begining to a new adventure in the life of Snow in the country.

Im not going to lie...

My kids are amazing!  They are amazing at so many things I can barely explain them all to you.  My kids are just over three and just under 2 years old and already they have surprised, scared, terrified, annoyed, impressed, and challenged me in so many ways.

My kids are amazing at talking.  Haylie didn't start talking early, but she sure hasn't stopped talking since (apparently a trait she picked up from me).  Hunter started talking early and he too has not stopped since he started.  Both will hold conversations on the phone with family, though often they will discuss things completely not on topic and wildly incomprehensible, but they do chat it up most times. 

My children are also amazing fallers/trippers.  Haylie will be walking just normal and bam! she hits the ground like you wouldn't believe.  Hunter likes to go at top speed (which really isn't that fast) and eat the floor rapidly (which isn't that low from where he stands) on a pretty frequent basis as well.  Both of them have made scrapes and scars that rival almost any I made in 30 years of living.  They also make me worry that one day someone in this small town is going to call CPS on me because they have bruises and scrapes and owies EVERYWHERE!

My children are amazing siblings.  I often find them holding hands in the back seat of the car over the middle seat as they sit happily in their own car seats.  I also have found them pushing the other child's face into the ground and laughing as the one face planting is crying.  This morning I heard my husband say, "Haylie don't do that to Hunter, Hunter don't throw things at Haylie, Haylie knock it off that hurts Hunter, Hunter are you kidding me..." and so on.  Whenever Hunter wakes up he looks towards Haylie's room and says, "Wheres Hunter?" (Not sure if he thinks everyone is Hunter or just him and Haylie).  Haylie also will keep an eye on Hunter and report on everything he is doing whether I ask her to or not.  This morning I sent Haylie to Timeout for misbehaving and next thing I know Hunter is standing in timeout with her just to make sure she isn't lonely.
My children are amazing Artists... In Nebraska Haylie took crayon and drew on her walls with it.  In Yuma, Haylie and Hunter took chalk and drew on every single part of the rental home to include the sliding screen door and the chairs that were placed outside.  Haylie also took permanent marker and drew on the walls in her room and her white 6 panel wood door.  Haylie and Hunter took a nice shade of red nail polish from my bathroom and painted Hunters crib as well as the floor in his room in our rental.  And now as we live in another rental in Wa, Hunter took a permanent marker to the wall outside.  Really kids???!!!???
My children are amazing sweethearts.  Haylie makes sure to tell me she loves me every day.  If I get an "owie" my dear daughter will come up and kiss me (if its a bonks she will kiss the owie, otherwise its safe to just kiss mommies forehead or cheek if the owie is a bleeder).  Every night when my husband or I put the kids to bed we sing some songs, say a prayer and say goodnight and I love you.  As we close the door, Hunter says "I love you Daddy, I love you Mommy" every night for the next 5-10 min.  Haylie will give the best little hugs in the planet if you want one, and sometimes if you didn't expect it.  Hunter will hug you if you play the "who's gonna give me a hug" game and if he is tired or just getting up. 

My children are amazing... They have taught me more than anyone in the planet about who I am, who I want to be, and what I want in my life. They have brightened so many days and pushed me to the end so many times. The kids remind me of why I love my mother and how I hope I can be like her as I continue to grow as a parent. My children are... Amazing!

When I grow up

When I was younger I had a lot of dreams of what I wanted to do when I grew up.  I came up with many different ideas ranging from Veterinarian to Astronaut, Doctor to Lawyer.  While I didn't have the typical girl dreams of growing up to have the perfect wedding or to find the perfect man, I still figured some of that would happen for me.  I also never dreamed of being a princess.  I was way to tomboyish to be thinking junk like that.  What is the practical application of pretending to be a princess anyhow?  So few women in the world ever even become a princess let alone are born into the opportunity that it just seems silly to this day.
Anyhow, as I got older and went to college I still had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I couldn't wait to be all grown up, but what to do was completely a mystery to me.  I started college thinking I would be an aerospace engineer, then I switched gears towards being a doctor.  I realized quickly that I didn't try very hard at school so these options weren't really feasible.  I finally picked a degree in History and a second degree in Spanish.  It seemed like a good fit since I love telling stories and I could speak Spanish pretty well already.  I started asking around at the career center about what I could do with these different vocations.  Turns out the person working that day believed I would be best suited for teaching.
I thought about this for a while and I guess I wanted more.  Why?  Was I above teaching?  (the answer is quite simply absolutely not)  Was I not ready for the commitment of my days and nights to a bunch of kids I didn't even know?  The answer was that I wanted to get away from home.  So I found another avenue, the military and the ROTC program.  I did two years and I was given a career by Uncle Sam as a Navigator.  I moved to Texas and started training a month after graduating college and began thinking that I might want to do something else with my life.  What?!?!?!  Really, I began asking what else I could do both for the Air Force and in general.
After a year of training I moved to Omaha, Ne and spent six years working as a Navigator.  I deployed a few times to different locations and made a home with my husband.  We were fortunate enough to get pregnant and now have our two little crazy people which completely changed my world.  So I again began to ask, what do I want to do when I grow up?  Finally it hit me... I have no clue, but whatever it is I can do it.  I considered all the above mentioned items (well  minus aerospace engineer and astronaut) again and still couldn't come up with anything.  Then I thought about the fact that in the military the part I liked the most was when I was teaching.  I instructed younger members in the AF in the exact job I was in at the time.  I loved it.  I enjoyed watching people get different concepts and figure out how to do their job better or just differently.  I was passionate about my job and about doing it well so it came easily.  I could really do this... maybe.
Anyhow, as some of you know I left my "career" in the Air Force and became a stay at home mom.  I am still not 100% sure what I want to be when I grow up, but I am hoping to become a teacher at some point.  The plan is to wait until the kids are in school so I can spend as much time with them as possible during their younger years.  I don't know if my chances are better or worse living in a small town, but I am staying optimistic.  I also decided I want to get a post baccalaureate in Math and work on getting certified as well.  Who knows what will happen, but I have my entire life to decide what I want to do so I better keep asking.

Cuddles and Independence

When I got pregnant with H1 I was very excited.  I found out she was a little girl and I was both worried and excited.  Most people would not describe me as a girly girl and frequently use words like tomboy or jock.  How was I going to be able to be a mom to a little girl?  I hoped that she would just be a little cuddle bug and would be happy with me as her mom even though I cant braid hair and don't really appreciate barbie dolls.  After she was born she slowly started showing C and I that she was going to be a very independent little soul.  I wasn't sure how long this would last or if it had something to do with me as a parent.  I continued to hope that she would just change into this little cuddle crazy kid and love sitting with me reading books or watching movies. 
As she continued to grow we had to put her into an in home daycare.  At first she was one of two kids, but after a bit we went to a bigger place.  She still wasn't very cuddly and I then attributed it to the fact that she couldn't be held all the time.  We finally decided it was good to have such an independent kiddo.  She didn't "need" us all the time which meant we could still do our own stuff.  She didn't need to be held all the time so we could have babysitters watch her and they said she was so easy and absolutely delightful.  I accepted that this was the way we wanted it to be.
We then had H2 and I figured, oh its a boy he wont be cuddly just like his sister wasn't cuddly.  When he came home H1 sometimes became cuddly out of jealousy.  She didn't change much she just requested a little more time from us, which made a lot of sense to me.  My son on the other hand always wanted to be held.  He isn't the annoying "cant put the kid down or he will cry" kind of child.  He is just a great cuddler.  We will all be sitting around watching a tv show or a movie and he just climbs right up and wants to be held.  He will be playing with toys and find a book and bring it right up to you, look you in the eyes, drop the book in your lap and sit down on your lap and say "book". 
Now that H1 is turning 3 next Friday and H2 is 1.5 yrs old as of yesterday, I am realizing that again, I have no idea what I am doing or what I am talking about when it comes to the kids.  I thought I would have a cuddle bug girl and I have a cuddle bug boy.  I thought my kids would be slow to start talking and I have two walking talking crazy people that sometimes tell stories I cant even pretend to fathom.  My little boy, the lovey cuddler, is also a crazy lunatic when it comes to climbing on everything and my little girl, the independent pumpkin, is also my fellow parent and daily assistant.  They both make me smile multiple times each day and remind me that even though I am just making this mommy thing up as I go, I'm doing a pretty good job.
I have two amazing kids that frequently come up and say "i wuv you mommy" and look up at me and say, "I want to hold you".  I have two amazing little people that say "I wuv you" to each other before naps and bedtime and share books and toys and play together a lot during the day.  I have my little cuddle boy and my independent little sweet girl and I couldn't be happier with how wrong I was about both of them before. 

So fortunate...

One of my friends on FB "liked" a link about a boy who died playing sports.  I decided to read it to try and understand why he "liked" the link.  The story goes that a 16 yr old star athlete collapsed after making the game winning basket and later died upon arriving at the hospital.  They don't know the cause for why he died yet.  I then read a bunch of comments below the article by random readers which mainly entailed a fight about someones belief about if there is a God or not and whether people should be praying for this poor kids family and whom they should pray to.  It was ridiculous.
Anyhow, I then checked my email and found a note from a cousin of mine.  Quick back story, they have 4 boys ranging from 6 yrs to 19yrs old.  2 of the boys are very healthy, one is partially blind and has seizures frequently and one of them has a disease that is yet to be determined or understood.  They frequently travel back and forth to a hospital on the east coast trying to determine what is going on with their youngest boy.  As I was saying, I received an email about the boys today and its more struggle.  The youngest has pneumonia and will need steroids and more drugs and they are hoping to keep him out of the hospital.  The other boy is possibly going permanently blind in both eyes and his brain is changing in ways that aren't positive causing him more and more seizures (I don't quite understand so please forgive me).
It absolutely breaks my heart to hear of young kids hurt or sick or dying.  Many friends of mine deal with different issues from weight gain or lack there of, hospital visits frequent or rare, broken bones, cancers and much more.  I think on days like today I just sit back and watch my kids and I am so thankful.  Whether it is to God or to genetics or to luck, I don't know.  I think things happen to everyone at different degrees and how we all get through it shows the type of people we are or will be.  My kids are healthy and happy and I am so fortunate.  We have our mishaps here and there, but on the whole we are very lucky.  I wish everyone can say that, and those that cant I hope they know there are people all around them that cant wait to help however they can.

my sweet little stinkers

Every once in a while I worry I am not cut out for this stay at home mom gig.  Don't get me wrong, I am way in love with my kids and I enjoy watching them grow and knowing what they are doing each day.  However, I have hit a few bumps in the road for many different reasons.
First and foremost, I have found grownup time with other people is a definite must.  I started going to Zumba which is only 1 hr three times a week and I am already a happier person.  Even time with C is tough because he needs to spend time with the kids too so finding our moments has become both more challenging and more special in some ways.
Another issue I'm facing is going from being a well respected professional who could always find an answer or solution to being this lost female trying very hard not to mess up my kids.  I used to be pretty good at my craft and I worked very hard at that for 7+ straight years.  Now I am causing tantrums, hollering for kids to stay in bed, cleaning up the same sq foot of my house 10x per day and losing my mind sometimes.  How could I have been so accomplished at one point in my life.
Finally, since we moved to a small town and I have moved 2x in 8 months (and am looking at another move to a different house in the same area soon) I feel a little lost here as well.  A lot of our stuff is still in boxes (probably the best thing we did) and I forget where some things are at different points in my day/month.  I am still looking for items I last saw in Yuma two months ago ... UGH!  That coupled with having to learn a new place and where to go for what has been a small challenge.
Anyhow, the upside to all of this is that my children seem to be adapting.  We don't know a lot of people yet, but there seem to be a fair amount of kids their ages here.  They put up with me going to Zumba and although Huntie is crying when I walk away, I think they are enjoying their time without me some as well.  The kids have also been reminding me to smile very frequently lately, which also helps out a ton.

Yesterday morning when I was sitting in the living room with the kiddos I had to sneeze.  Both the kids were engaged in a Phineas and Ferb show at the time.  Anyhow, I sneezed and my 1.5 yr old turned around and looked at me with his angelic face and said "God Bless You".  No kidding.  I was totally taken by this moment.  Unfortunately I had to sneeze again, and again my little cutie pants turned and looked at me and said "God Bless You".  I couldn't believe it.  I was smiling from ear to ear and had to scoop him right up and give him a hug.

Later that same day as I was putting Hay down for a nap she started reciting one of our favorite books , I Love You Stinky Face.  She quoted the little kids part asking his mommy if she would still love him is he was a super smelly skunk who smelled so bad his name was stinky face.  She then responded as the mommy saying she would give him a bubble bath, but if he still was stinky she wouldn't mind.  She then said, " I would whisper in your ear, (and she leaned forward and whispered in my ear) I love you stinky face."  Hay then sat back and smiled at me and I couldn't help but squish her and give her a huge hug and kiss. 
These moments always make me pause and I actually feel that even though they drive me nuts sometimes, they are turning out pretty great.  And that is what keeps me going each day and reminds me that quiting my job was one of the best things/gifts I could have done for myself.

Did I say 2 kids, I have 3....

My dear sweet husband is a bit of a gamer.  Since sometimes he gets so involved and forgets to respond to any questions or to his kids I figured maybe Haylie and Hunter should help daddy play games.  So Haylie got her own controller (to the PS3) while Daddy played his XBox 360.  Hunter was content playing with his shoes.

She was so involved I got a little worried.  Luckily she only played for about 5 min total.

I have to say though, they were pretty cute. 

 

So that was how we spent the night before we decided to go sledding.  C and I decided to take the kids out to an open area with some great hills and introduce them to the joys of sledding.

They were all smiles to start and C did an AWESOME job hauling them all over the hill and the general area.  We walked about 100 yards to get to the bottom of the hill and then he took them up for their ride.

He was such a trooper as he kept lugging the kids up the hill to have fun.

It seemed like Hay was loving the experience, but I wasn't too sure about Hunter.

So we let Daddy take a trip by himself and the kids and I stayed at the bottom of the hill.

Turned out Hunter was not happy that he had to walk on this snow.  He elected instead to stand there and cry, which Daddy assumed meant he was jealous he didn't get to go down the big hill. (yeah right)

So here he is... my big kid.  He had a blast and so did the kids and I, so it worked out for all of us.  I also got some great pics of C taking his trip down the big hill and eating quite a bit of snow half way down... but that's for a different time.

cooking for the first time...

My life is ever changing and has thrown me quite a few twists and turns.  One of the biggest changes has been the need for me to learn to cook.  I grew up as a latch key kid.  My mom either volunteered time or worked throughout most of my childhood.  My dad and mom split when I was about 10 so it was a necessity for her to work.  Anyhow, all her time out of the house meant little time learning how to do the typical "female role" tasks.  That coupled with the fact that my mom is a feminist kind of affected the way I looked at the importance of learning to cook as well.
Anyhow, I moved to San Antonio after college and learned to cook some things.  Mainly I use recipe books and it worked out for me since I am such a math mind.  After that I moved to Omaha, Ne and again did the same thing.  However, I have always had the opportunity to say, nah lets go out for dinner tonight.  Now that we have moved to a town of 400-500+ people and few restaurants my circumstances are dictating that I learn to be a better cook.
So far I have attempted to make a few different meals, some with great outcomes and some with mediocre outcomes.  I made an outstanding Chicken Pot Pie from scratch that made me so proud.  I also burned some cookies (ridiculous) and made some average chicken meals that my husband and kids kind of forced down.  We have also had A LOT of pasta... ugh! 
Let me also point out that I dont have a microwave, so if I do make things I try to make only what we will eat or something I can remake easily.  Luckily I talked with a friend of mine about what to do and she mentioned a few tricks like making old rice into fried rice.  So, last night I made fried rice and it was AWESOME.  That is pretty rare for me.  Anyhow, I figure this is a process so hopefully I will become better with time and maybe at some point I will invite everyone over for dinner and you will all be blown away.
Hopefully you will get to see some of my food adventures on this blog and if possible I will take a few pictures of my amazing creations.  I just keep reminding myself, its all a process and one day at a time.

Boys are dumb...

SO, being that I had a girl first I have had a lot of fun seeing the difference between boys and girls.  Let me start with some personality differences in my children.
Haylie is energetic, playful, stubborn, very bright, talkative, wants to be involved, outgoing and shy depending on the situation, and she can get very focused on things whether its drawing/coloring, watching a show/movie or reading.  She took on the very common role of helper/mother person when Hunter was born.  She is a type-a+ so she is somewhat controlling, but not overly-so most of the time.  She and Hunter run all over the house all the time and play or get into tons of stuff
Hunter is lovey/cuddly, talkative, always moving, also very bright, sweet, into everything, and eager to learn.
This is where I begin with why boys are dumb...
Some of you may know we have two cats.  Well my genius son thinks that Cat food is AWESOME!  He sometimes likes to dabble with the cat litter as well.  Also AWESOME!  He frequently climbs on everything.  This is something that took Haylie a while to get into.  Hunter however climbs on anything, sturdy or not, and more often than not he falls off and hits his head.
While eating my son likes to look me straight in the eyes, drop his food onto the ground and say "uh oh mommy".  He tries to carry things up the stairs that are as big as he is, and he has only been doing stairs for the two week we have lived here.  He also has this weird habit where he crawls on the floor with his head dragging on the ground.  Its like he is pushing his head around on the floor.  Sometimes we think he does this just when he is tired, but not 100% on that hypothesis.
Again, those who don't know my kids... Hunter has the head size of a grown up.  Luckily it doesn't look too disproportionate, but it is definitely bigger than the average 1.5 yr old.  So the fact that he falls on his head is almost an expected event.  However, if he doesn't start being smarter about things than I am going to get CPS called on me for abuse or neglect or something.  He continually has bruises and black eyes and red marks all over his forehead and face.  Maybe someday he will smarten up... then again, looking at his dad.... ;o)

First Impressions

I always hate first impressions.  There is so much riding on them and yet most the time we just blow them way out of proportion.  Since this is the second time I have moved this year I am getting to redo many first impressions.  Its both frustrating and somewhat terrifying.  I would hate for these new people to dislike me on account of the fact that we now live in a small town and they are the only ones our age.
This kind of pressure reminds me of high school.  I never really felt like I was good enough or like I fit in.  I spent a lot of time trying to be what everyone wanted me to be, which I dont think helped me find out who I wanted to be.  I was torn between being a band member and an athlete.  I was in "AP" type classes but didnt study much so I didnt always do great if it didnt come naturally.  I was a church goer and a kid that never ditched school except on Senior Ditch Day.
When I got out of high school I went to college and decided I wanted to reinvent myself.  I elected to give up on the soccer thing and the band thing and try and be "cool".  I lost who I was to try and be someone else.  I joined a sorority and later joined ROTC and then my life just kept going.  I dont regret any of this because it helped me get to where I am and to the family I now have... but if I didnt know about this life and I could do it again I wonder how it would have gone.
So, back to making first impressions... I used to love being around people and getting involved.  Now I feel like its a bit taxing and its always been a popularity contest.  Am I skinny enough, do I wear this or that, what are they going to think of me, how much do I say???? The questions are neverending.  Guess the best we can do is just keep trying and maybe someday we wont choose to worry so much about first impressions and we will finally be comfortable with who we are now.

Getting Connected

After moving to Ione, Charlie and I discussed just how much of the electronic sensation we needed to have in the house.  We are both big movie people so we have quite a collection (around 900 movies+) and we also enjoy video games.  So we thought maybe just internet would be sufficient for us.  If we wanted to watch any shows we would just look them up on the internet and that would be enough.  Then it took about a week and a half to get the internet hooked up and we started to doubt ourselves.
So, we ended up getting dish network.  I have never had satelite TV before so it is something new at least.  It seems like a sweet deal though and it includes much more than most the cable selections we ever had.  The best part about finally having the internet and the TV setup though.... its snowing outside and its cold.  Once it stops I will probably take the kids out to go sledding, but until then I am glad we get to watch something different than Bolt, Cars, Phineas and Ferb.... the three favorite things we have watched probably 20 times each since moving from Yuma. 
On a side note, I find it depressing that I was so lost without these things.  Charlie and I both had a hard time feeling connected or up to date on anything that was going on.  We dont even watch the news regularly, but I think we missed the chance to do it.  Maybe getting older means we will actually start paying attention to the world around us more.

My First Attempt

I have been sitting on my couch in the new house and stories have been flooding my mind.  So I decided to try out this blog thing.  We moved to Ione, Wa from Yuma, Az on Jan 6, 2011.  I was raised in Phoenix so being in Yuma was like being near my childhood home.  The kids and I spent a good amount of holidays and random weekends visiting all the family and we got to know more about Yuma in the 6 months we lived there. 
The trip up was thankfully uneventful.  We drove up through Las Vegas to Salt Lake City and then Salt Lake City to Ritzville, Wa (for me and the kids while Charlie and his Uncle continued on to Ione) and then to Ione, Wa.  Its a small town in the Northeast corner of Washington state for those who dont know.  I had no idea about it until we started looking at the area.  I read that it has a population of 500 or so and that it is about 45 min from a walmart, 1.5 hr from costco/target/Spokane, and 20 miles or so from the Canadian border.  What was I going to do with that?
When we arrived the ground was covered in snow and the time was early afternoon.  It was about 15 degrees outside which was very different from the highs of 60 in Yuma 3 days earlier.  The house is a sweet little 4 bedroom 2 bath 2 story house that is between 1200 and 1500 sq ft.  Overall I was pleased as I know we have a ton of stuff.  Getting settled in has taken about a week and a half, not to mention restocking a kitchen and household.  On the upside, I think we are finally there.  We have our internet set up, our phone setup, the kitchen is good to go and we get our Dish Network tomorrow afternoon.  Not too shabby. 
On a small aside, the views here are absolutely stunning.  The towns run up the Pend Oreille River and are situated between mountains at all points.  There are green trees everywhere and beauty to be found at any turn.  I saw 8 deer run across the road the other day while driving and Charlie and I got the chance to see a sweet set of 5 deer on the side of the road just 3 days prior to that.  Its definitely a place he will enjoy, and I think I might like it as well.  While it is very different from the urban jungle I have grown up with, it is something I am excited to learn about as time progresses.